10k (Tommy) (
slingshotting) wrote in
kismet_loop_logs2016-08-01 08:55 pm
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We all grieve in our own way
Who: 10k
What: One awkward bamf zombie killer arrives.
Where: The West Sector; starting in the Crystal Forest, can be moved as he will make his way around, not just sit on his behind
When: Right here; Right now aka 8/1/2016 moments after his arrival
Warnings: Intro post talks of death and contains spoilers for s2 of Z Nation in first few paragraphs.
The wind blew softly through the trees, the sky above was unblemished. For a night of hell it was beautiful. That beauty only strengthened the guilt, pain, regret in 10k, his eyes cast skyward as he remembered. He remembered the good times. He remembered the blood that fell from her mouth, warm against his cheek, he remembered the feel of her blood as it coated his fingers. He could feel the weight of her corpse on his chest. He told himself he had to stop thinking of her and think of it, that thing was no longer Cassandra. Because every time he thought of her something deep inside him broke, hardened and broke again in a fresh wave of emotion.
He took a deep breath, closed his eyes and counted to ten while he steadied his breathing and forced his mind to go blank. Aching in his search for the blissful nothing he wanted to feel. It was there at his fingertips, if he could take a few more switches and turn them off he could bury this the way he had buried the rest. He could remind himself that logically it was what had to be done. Logic had no control over the ache of the heart and soul, this was a lesson that this fracking world taught him over and over again.
"Thank you, Tommy...." He could still hear her.
His breath was anguished, no one since his pa had called him Tommy and he shuddered as the force of it hit him. Cassandra was gone, the thing she had become was gone. He had to kill her, the good of his friends who were still alive depended on it. Then another realization took hold, slashed at the ache and tinged it blood red with anger at the edges.
Murphy.... He could taste the copper of anger in his mouth.
If Murphy had not bit her, if he had let her go with the dignity she deserved none of this would have happened. He knew that his anger would have no true outlet because he could not kill Murphy. Not when the fate of the world was at stake, he was not a selfish young man. His resolve, determination and quiet strength would carry him through even the tornado in his veins. Because one day, he would have what he needed most, an end to this insanity and the life of the man who had taken someone special from him.
10k cracked his eyes open at last, his mind settled more than it had been. He could not feel anything but that anger helped steel his insides and had him standing straighter, breathing easier. Till he saw the fog, it was thick, all around him and he sucked a breath in. Instinct had the hunting knife at his waist in his hand in an instant. Fingers fitted perfectly to the handle, his gun would do no good in this when he could not see an inch in front of his face. He heard no sound of any z but that did not mean they were not there.
They had lit no fire, safety came first and no one was much in the mood to sit up and talk. A few hours of rest and then it was on the road again, Cassandra's death had hung over them all, even if not a one had shown a sign of blaming him. He took a moment to get his bearing, mind accessing the scenario he found himself in. Weighed options and thought six steps ahead before he took one step from the spot he had opened his eyes to find himself in. 10k knew no matter what was going on here, the first thing he had to do was find the group and get them all to safety where the fog could not give a z the perfect opportunity.
In a matter of moments what he had thought fog turned into more of a mist, fading out as the vapors let go of their hold and the Crystal Forest came into view, 10k sheathed the knife. He tugged his rifle over his shoulder, fitted it to his shoulder and checked through the scope.
He saw nothing familiar in the distance, he did not know where he was or why he was there but he did know, he had to find his friends. He does not place the rifle over his shoulder but instead holds it steady in his hand. His steps are calculated, rolling them as to avoid making noise and he stopped every few feet to read the terrain through his scope.
What: One awkward bamf zombie killer arrives.
Where: The West Sector; starting in the Crystal Forest, can be moved as he will make his way around, not just sit on his behind
When: Right here; Right now aka 8/1/2016 moments after his arrival
Warnings: Intro post talks of death and contains spoilers for s2 of Z Nation in first few paragraphs.
The wind blew softly through the trees, the sky above was unblemished. For a night of hell it was beautiful. That beauty only strengthened the guilt, pain, regret in 10k, his eyes cast skyward as he remembered. He remembered the good times. He remembered the blood that fell from her mouth, warm against his cheek, he remembered the feel of her blood as it coated his fingers. He could feel the weight of her corpse on his chest. He told himself he had to stop thinking of her and think of it, that thing was no longer Cassandra. Because every time he thought of her something deep inside him broke, hardened and broke again in a fresh wave of emotion.
He took a deep breath, closed his eyes and counted to ten while he steadied his breathing and forced his mind to go blank. Aching in his search for the blissful nothing he wanted to feel. It was there at his fingertips, if he could take a few more switches and turn them off he could bury this the way he had buried the rest. He could remind himself that logically it was what had to be done. Logic had no control over the ache of the heart and soul, this was a lesson that this fracking world taught him over and over again.
"Thank you, Tommy...." He could still hear her.
His breath was anguished, no one since his pa had called him Tommy and he shuddered as the force of it hit him. Cassandra was gone, the thing she had become was gone. He had to kill her, the good of his friends who were still alive depended on it. Then another realization took hold, slashed at the ache and tinged it blood red with anger at the edges.
Murphy.... He could taste the copper of anger in his mouth.
If Murphy had not bit her, if he had let her go with the dignity she deserved none of this would have happened. He knew that his anger would have no true outlet because he could not kill Murphy. Not when the fate of the world was at stake, he was not a selfish young man. His resolve, determination and quiet strength would carry him through even the tornado in his veins. Because one day, he would have what he needed most, an end to this insanity and the life of the man who had taken someone special from him.
10k cracked his eyes open at last, his mind settled more than it had been. He could not feel anything but that anger helped steel his insides and had him standing straighter, breathing easier. Till he saw the fog, it was thick, all around him and he sucked a breath in. Instinct had the hunting knife at his waist in his hand in an instant. Fingers fitted perfectly to the handle, his gun would do no good in this when he could not see an inch in front of his face. He heard no sound of any z but that did not mean they were not there.
They had lit no fire, safety came first and no one was much in the mood to sit up and talk. A few hours of rest and then it was on the road again, Cassandra's death had hung over them all, even if not a one had shown a sign of blaming him. He took a moment to get his bearing, mind accessing the scenario he found himself in. Weighed options and thought six steps ahead before he took one step from the spot he had opened his eyes to find himself in. 10k knew no matter what was going on here, the first thing he had to do was find the group and get them all to safety where the fog could not give a z the perfect opportunity.
In a matter of moments what he had thought fog turned into more of a mist, fading out as the vapors let go of their hold and the Crystal Forest came into view, 10k sheathed the knife. He tugged his rifle over his shoulder, fitted it to his shoulder and checked through the scope.
He saw nothing familiar in the distance, he did not know where he was or why he was there but he did know, he had to find his friends. He does not place the rifle over his shoulder but instead holds it steady in his hand. His steps are calculated, rolling them as to avoid making noise and he stopped every few feet to read the terrain through his scope.
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